Posts from the ‘oy vey’ Category

and there she is!

our official kindergartner!!  jasper lilith might not be 5 just yet but she is definitely a kindergartner!

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and she knows it, too, doesn’t she?

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clearly, this is old hat to her 🙂

she was excited but she was just so cool about it all – she went right up to her new teacher and said, “hi, mrs. thompson!  remember me?  i’m jasper!”

and she already had a couple of kids calling her name – i guess they met at the Meet-The-Teach Picnic last week?

like i said, old hat!

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but not to me!

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jasper’s locker in her kindergarten room…  oh my god, my daughter is old enough to have a locker now…

never mind…  i’m not thinking about it.

“what do you want to be when you grow up?”

jasper has wanted to be a veterinarian since before she could actually pronounce  the full word 🙂

of course, she also wants to be a painter, a photographer, a scientist, a farmer and an astronaut so…

pre-k graduation… oh, bleep.

did they have pre-k graduations back when we were kids?   i don’t remember but i know they sure have them now.

my proof?  jasper has “graduated” from pre-k…  it’s official…  she is a kindergartener.

they even had graduation hats!!!


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now why would they do that to us mothers?

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a smiling, happy 4 year old!

“mommy, is it time for my graduation yet?”

jasper picked her dress out (and her cowboy boots) several days before…  at 7 am…  she came in one morning, all dressed up, and woke me up to show me what she was going to wear on her “special day”.

i didn’t even see the cowboy boots until later though…  you know, when i was actually awake 🙂

i was…  unenthusiastic about the boots but when i asked about them, i could tell there was no quarter; she felt like she HAD to wear them!  far be it for me to say she shouldn’t!

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lots of “hi, jaspers!” and “bye, jaspers!” and she was busy waving to them all 🙂

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it was very windy (like tornado watch windy, in fact) so jasper quickly went into her Feel The Wind Stance.

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a piece of a cake and a happy face!

congratulations, jaspernator!

the pacifier fairy… no, really, i’m not making that up…

hmmm, where to start…  where to start…

so jasper has been having an ongoing love affair with her pacifier – she just loves it…  we limit her to being able to use it only at night but she would suck on a paci all day long if i let her…

i haven’t been that focused on weaning her off of it – just doesn’t seem like that big of a deal to me but i finally thought, “ok, she is over 3 years old now, in school and i think it is time…”

and so it was time…

i had done some research about it a long, long time ago in a galaxy far way…  back when she was almost one and it seemed like A Big Deal that she loved her paci so much…  it didn’t take me long to decide it wasn’t worth rocking that boat yet 🙂

but, due to my great foresight, i saved some of the articles that i had looked up – one of them i came across talked about something called The Pacifier Fairy

i remembered the story, looked it up again and thought, “well, that isn’t all bad – fairies, gifts, she likes both, right?”

and so our Hyams Paci Fairy was born…

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i am embarrassed to admit that i went full throttle on this fairy gig – i found some fairy notecards with little cut out butterflies and printed one out, i found a kitty with fairy wings and last but not least, i bought a cupcake…  nothing fairy about the cupcake although i did stick some butterfly cutouts in the frosting 🙂

i started talking the paci fairy up for several days and getting jasper familiar with this whole made up concept…  (please don’t reference santa claus, heather, i know…  i know…)

i dug up a pretty little cloth bag and we went around the house gathering up all the pacis (there were only two but you know), put them in the bag and hung it up in the window in jasper’s room – uh, so the paci fairy could see it, natch…

then we talked about what was going to happen and all that jazz and then?  we went to bed…  without her paci…  for the first time in her entire 3 years of living on this earth…

and she did fine…

she did better than fine, actually, she handled it with aplomb and made me very appreciative at how adaptable this child is…

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and the next morning, she woke up to find her notecard, her fairy kitty and the cupcake!  make no mistake, she was most excited about the cupcake she got to eat for breakfast!

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the things we parents do…  so silly…

but, hey, we are on our 4th night of paci free sleeping and not one tear has been shed, not one night spent in anguish – it was worth feeling silly about all this fairy nonsense for that alone…


the rabbit hole…

so i hear, “momma!!  don’t come in, ok?  i play by myself, ok?”

and then i hear a door shut so i walk around the corner to see what the story is and i see this:

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a very shut door to jasper’s room…  with a little girl telling me to “not come in” from the other side of this closed door…  huh…

and just to test the waters, i knock on the door and call out a “hallo the house!” and, to my surprise, she throws the door open wide and says, “come in, momma!”

hmm, i like this version much better!  so i go in and she points me to the recliner…  i sit down and jasper turns back to shut the door again (with me inside the room this time!)  and says, “welcome to my houzze, momma!  welcome to my houzze!”

the girl has a way with words, doesn’t she?

so i hang out in the recliner while jasper goes about the business of being an almost 3 year old…

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here she is taking the temperature of some of her horses…  “oh, no!  take tempeuhchure!  houhses sick!”

the diagnosis?  “houhses need nap!”

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and here she is piling on her jewelry…  can’t wear just one necklace or bracelet, oh no!

between her actions and her conversation (not to mention the impromptu singing),  she keeps me quite entertained!

my own little walking entertainment center!  priceless, just priceless!

poor little puppy…

well, we should be on our way to natchitoches right now but plans have been turned on their topsy-turvy…  ‘cuz the jasper lilith is sick…

she ran a fever all day yesterday and it finally broke early this morning  (whew!) but she is feeling very puny still…   neither of us got much sleep last night…

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here is our little cougher snuggled on the couch looking down enough to hurt a mama’s heart…

ah-ha!! i caught you!!

see what i mean??!!


here is jasper lilith’s little ladder put into action!  if she wants something on the bar, she makes her step ladder and gets it!  never mind that it is way too high and gives her mama a heart attack every time i see her do it!  nope, never mind that!

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see her loudly saying, “heeuh, mama!!  want a gummy dwop?” oh, she knows her tricks – caught red-handed and she tries to smooth it over by sharing with me…  cheeky monkey!

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“ohtay, mama!  i get one for daddee!”

OH!!!!  and she goes for the double whammy of “sharing” with daddy, too!!!

yesterday she went into arnetta’s tupperware drawer (a drawer handily situated low enough for jasper to open and dig around in), pulled out an empty butter tub, dug around for the matching lid (very important that!), went to the cereal cabinet (also handily situated to be low enough for jasper to open and pull out the cereal or cracker boxes), pulled out her box of cheerios and then proceeded to show us how messy having an independent child can be…  jasper put the butter tub on the floor and poured her cheerios into it…  and while she certainly managed to fill the tub up, she also managed to pour twice as many cheerios on the floor all around her!

“dont wowwy, mama!  i did it!” she crows proudly!

i mean really, how can you be upset at that?  jon says that this is what i get for teaching her to do things for herself…  and that is ok, her independence might be messy now but it will pay off in the  long run!!  right?  right?

luckily, jasper also likes to clean up so after we congratulated her on getting her own cup of cereal for herself, we asked her to go get the hand broom and dust pan (which she did) and then asked her to help us clean up all the cheerios on the floor (which she did as well while saying, “uh, oh, mama, daddee!  cheewios evewywhey!  i sowwy…” ) so it helps that jasper is a good picker-upper, too!

i wish i had gotten a picture of her standing in the middle of a circle of cheerios, holding the cereal box up, pointing to the full butter tub and grinning like a madman as proud as proud could be!

life with jasper lilith is A Very Good Thing!

don’t mind me, mama…

so we are in natchitoches, louisiana now to visit jasper’s gram and pop for a bit…  hello from louisiana everyone!

jasper lilith doesn’t let the height of a counter stop her – oh, no…

she just makes a little homemade ladder and goes right on up!

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i walk in to the kitchen and see jasper climbing up her stepping stones to get some bread…  she sees me and says, “hi, mama!  i got it!” and she goes on to grab some bread, climb down and go sit on daddy’s lap…

mmm, i am starting to feel a bit redundant…  she is a problem-solver, that one!

my baby is still sick…

so jasper lilith has a particularily resilent form of a stomach virus…  and i know this because she is still stuck with it!

she was sick from early sunday morning but she seemed fine on monday and most of tuesday…  ha!  the virus was just syking us out because she went back to not being able to keep anything down (except for fluids) on tuesday and has been like that since…

the nurses keep telling me to not worry about anything except dehydration but uh, hello?  worry is now my middle name!  forget elizabeth, that is no more, nope, now it is just daune the worrywart hyams…

and she now she has diarrhea and gas to contend with…

she might be going to the doctor tomorrow;  nurses be damned…

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here is a slightly fuzzy “jasper is sick” version of one of our end tables…  the vomit bowl is out of the line of sight but never fear, still there…  since sunday…  which is way too long ago…

what?  doesn’t every house have a vomit bowl?

the measuring cup and syringe are my trickier ways of getting jasper lilith to drink more…  cups don’t always cut it when all she can have are liquids…  the girl is tired of liquids!

siamese twins…

jasper lilith and her daddy are watching a movie called robots and i have the audacity to vacuum while they are oh, so busy doing all the watching!  the sheer nerve of me!

well, i persevere through all the “daunes!  mom-moms!  vacuum cweaner offs!” noise from the peanut gallery and just continue vacuuming as quick as is humanly possible…  jasper gets all bothered by my vacuuming and decides to climb into jons lap and so the next time i turn around, i see this…

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i have somehow traded in my two peoples for a two-headed, red-jacketed sofa monster!!!

they were quite comfortable all cocooned up like that and remained like that for some time 🙂